Kim Kardashian’s Breakdown As Monologue

KIM

I had dinner with him last night one on one and I was going…crazy. I had nothing to talk to him about. He’s a good heart. He’s a Christian. He’s everything on paper exactly what I wanted in someone. But for some reason  my heart isn’t connecting. I’ve tried and I’ve tried but I don’t know what to do. And I want my whole family to at least BACK ME. You think I feel good that I like….met this guy from Minnesota  and I…….I….I feel awful that like…I MADE  him move out here and like, and change his WHOLE LIFE  and I feel bad for him?!?! I FEEL SAD. I FEEL BAD FOR THE GUY. I CHANGED HIS WHOLE LIFE AND HE FELL IN LOVE WITH ME AND I FELL IN LOVE WITH HIM AND NOW MY FEELINGS HAVE CHANGED!  You don’t think I feel bad that I invited all these people to this huge wedding and FLEW EVERYONE OUT  and wasted everyones time? You know… I wasted everyones money. I wasted everyones …EVERYTHING…. and I feel BAD. YOU DON’T THINK I FEEL BAD???????!!!!! AT THIRTY YEARS OLD I THOUGHT I’D BE MARRIED WITH KIDS AND I’M NOT. I FAILED AT THIS AND YOU DON’T THINK I FEEL BAD?!!!?!!!!!

Planned Parenthood Saved My Mom’s Life

So, I normally don’t conflate my blog with personal politics- and I was just about to write a thank you note to everyone regarding  the awesome support during snakes –but I saw this and need to switch gears a bit and write about my experience with Planned Parenthood. If you have time,  please sign this. To read a million more  stories about how Planned Parenthood saves lives: go here.  It is a blog called Planned Parenthood Saved Me and it’s where this story, like many others are  posted in hopes of support.

me and my mom. Terrible pic of me but isn’t she pretty?

Since I never had health insurance growing up, I had to learn how to be resourceful when it came to taking care of my lady parts at a young age.  Naturally, Planned Parenthood has been my OGBYN for years and no matter where I moved to when I left home or traveled to after college to pursue my  struggling artist endeavors,  I knew I could always count on a Planned Parenthood clinic that would accept me with open arms in times of horrible UTI’s, girl emergencies and general checkups. However, I was always worried about my mom back home, who, due to language barriers,  didn’t necessarily have the skill-set to do much research on her own, especially regarding personal healthcare without insurance.  But she looked completely normal (and beautiful) and took routine checkups at the local emergency  room every couple of years with fine results, so I assumed everything was okay for the time being (or at least until she got super old).  However, in April 2008,  when she was barely 50,  my mom mentioned to me that she had been bothered by a strange  lump in her left breast for a few months during a casual phone call. I completely freaked out.   And although I felt helpless, being thousands of miles away from her, I knew I could rely on her  local Planned Parenthood to find out if anything was seriously wrong. So I called the number immediately and after quickly explaining the situation to the kind operator, she  graciously squeezed my mom in for a same day appointment. After a screening, they rushed her to see the right doctor, and  much to our dismay-she was subsequently diagnosed with stage 2a breast cancer. Thanks to their insights, my mom was able to get proper treatment, and   after struggling through surgery, radiation, chemo, and many tears,  she  is now cancer free.  Since Breast cancer  is a ticking-time bomb where  months, weeks and even days can often mean a difference between life and death, Planned Parenthood’s prompt assistance and compassion was life-saving. Without them, my mom might not be here today. The defunding of the Susan G. Komen for the Cure breast-cancer foundation sends a horrible message that the lives of every single mother does not matter. That some mothers aren’t worth saving.  Can the world really be that cruel?  Planned Parenthood’s cancer screening program is so important and it needs our support.  Without this amazing organization, I wouldn’t have known who to call or who to trust to ensure that my mom was in  good hands in a time of great need. Please fight. Fight for mothers. Fight for every woman.  Fight for Planned Parenthood!

It’s Friday Friday and Tomorrow is Saturday So Come see Flying Snakes in 3-D (Two More Performances)

We’re down to the last two performances of Flying Snakes in 3-d!!! Get your tickets to ensure seats at https://web.ovationtix.com/trs/pr/899505

PS. I love you!

And More

More comments on the issue and I will continue to shamelessly plug.  Get your tickets here: https://web.ovationtix.com/trs/pr/899505

PS-I am getting to the point where I think people who have read my blog and also come to Flying Snakes in 3-D!!! are going to be completely surprised when they find out that the piece is a comedy.

PSS- Remember when a  similar thing happened around this time last year and we ended up in The Guardian?  Where is ?

From Andrew

Kevin-

Some interesting thoughts, though your thesis of the need for artists to start thinking of their work as a business does raise some important questions for me. As a playwright, it’s always very difficult to listen to the audience when revising or developing a piece, especially if audience members are not artists themselves. Especially if they’re not theatre artists. Especially if they’re not playwright. This is in no way a statement of elevated status, it’s logic. An electrician wouldn’t ask a televison producer how to better wire a house….etc. Too often I’ve found audience members disagreeing with elements of my plays, suggesting changes of ending, being confused by symbols…etc because they didn’t agree or “understand” it in a visceral sense that they were able to relate to their own personal experience. This is not me being defensive, it’s realizing my vision and intention being addressed from outside, critical eyes. It’s a simple disagreement, and in business, the old adage goes: “The customer is always right.” In this case, “customer” would translate to “audience” or even “producer” (if we should be so lucky). But often times in audience response you have polarities in opinions, most of which come from a responsive place of “I want to see this” vs. “The play/story needs this”. As Leah has brilliant articulated and defended, audience reaction come from a place of personal taste and personal history. Sometimes – in my opinion, all too frequently- artists have their art being criticized and reviewed by members of the varying different classes/statuses/gender/race/sex… and yes, while this is productive for dialogue, how productive is it in the further development and/or the evaluation of the art?

I’m very worried that if we artists begin to look at our work through a heavy business lens, we’ll be creating work that lacks breath, lacks muscles, lacks ourselves. In business, you change plans and models to cater to the customers who are keeping you afloat. If theatre does this, then what’s the point?

Keep in mind too, that Shakespeare was writing in a different time, a different place, and different stories. He is a master of the stage because of TALENT and because, frankly, what other playwright of the time created the complex, beautiful, dynamic stories that he did? It was just a different time, so therefore not at all comparable.

Just my thoughts.
I loved FLYING SNAKES IN 3-D because it made me LAUGH. It was funny, it was campy, it had snakes being represented as silly sock-pockets the actors slipped over their hands. They hissed. They danced. They came from a place of privilege. And they were defeated. By a large mongoose. I loved FLYING SNAKES IN 3-D.

Andrew

More Amazeballs Comments and a New Trailer for Flying Snakes in 3-D!!!

A director friend of mine wrote to me this morning: “Who says theatre is dead? How can it be dead when all these folks are chomping at the bit to chime in? Amazeballs!”

I completely agree. However,  with all this talk about underprivileged children- I have to reiterate: Do Not Bring Kids To This Show. It is rated R for violence, language sexuality and dead babies. Everywhere Theatre Group simply stated the fact that we come from poor families and are still making art and that we aren’t going away. I was actually really confused as to why people thought that we were trying to promote this show to kids until a reader emailed me and explained it to me by saying “I think probably the difficulty people are having, and why so many of us thought you are reaching out at inner city kids or poor people or something, is that is is difficult for people to understand your frustrations about being “poor theatre artists.” Not because people don’t recognize the difficulty of being a poor maker of theatre, but because they assume, pretty much rightly, that makers of theatre (actors, writers, directors, et. al) are ALL POOR. Now obviously, this is not true, as there are many actors and directors being propped up by their rich parents, and it does require a certain amount of backing and support to even attempt a career as a theatre artist nowadays. But you understand, this is a difficult message to get across to people because they feel like, well duh, you are in the theatre, of course you are poor.”

Maybe. I don’t know. I also think my definition of poor ( poverty that roots back that isn’t fun or cool at all- rather than, my parents are physicians! and I’m a broke theater artist black sheep!  yipee!) is totally different from a lot of artists. And regarding audience- as I said before- I mean, we’re trying to reach out to as many people as possible.  We love our audience. But for the love of God, no children please. Anyways, sometimes, our work speaks for itself. Below you can check out the amazing trailer #2 Chase Voorhees made for Flying Snakes in 3-d!! You can check out trailer #1 here.    Hope to see you at Flying Snakes on Thursday, Friday and Saturday at 8 pm! Buy tickets here!  We’re sold out for this Thursday night, but you can get on a waitlist at the door and more tickets will be released!

And Now For More Comments:

  1. I’ve been following this interdemensional controversy for a while now, but a bunch of stuff Kevin said up there I can’t help but comment on.

    Since I help run Tenement Street (an art collective) I thought I might reply as if what Kevin said had been brought up in one of our weekly board meetings and the issues he raises have to be resolved.

    Issue:
    “Obviously, theatre cannot provide the level of effects or production values of movies, but we can tell stories that are just as young and exciting, and we can fill them with sexy, fit actors with strong voices and minds”

    The Board Resolves:
    To recast our next production with people from David Barton’s gym and rescind membership status to anyone bigger than a peanut. We will also revise Chekhov’s “Three Sisters” into Chekhov’s “Three Hot Lesbian Sisters.”

    Issue:
    “We cannot see the theatre as the dumping ground for all things too “arty” for the cinema, and we cannot give ourselves a pass as “theatre actors” to be shlubby, out of shape, nerds. This is not an argument against character actors, but an argument for theatre actors holding themselves to the same high standards as movie stars. (Stay in shape, eat right, be flexible and limber, keep stylish) ”

    The Board Resolves:
    To become movie stars…

    Issue:
    “Yes we have to do stories we are passionate about, but you still gotta “give-em-what-they-want” so to speak”

    The Board Resolves:
    To understand exactly what they want and how to give it to em’ while continuing to be sexy ass movie stars. (we’re lookin at you Brad Pitt…The Curious Case of Benjamin Button? Really?! HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT WOULD DO WELL?! Damn you Brad.)

    Issue:
    “Not many 17 year old black kids from the inner city Bronx are coming out there to the Lorimer stop on a Friday night, get real”

    The Board Resolves:
    To send a bus every Friday night to Mosholu Parkway and pick up 17 year old black teenagers and drop them off on Lorimer.

    Send hate or love to thankyou@tenementstreet.org

    January 25, 2012 2:21 am
  2. John,

    You must be doing extremely well over at Tenement Street in order to take such a glib tone in response to my comments. I find such a snarky response to my earnest concerns about the perception of the theatre to be actually quite telling. (Thank you for proving my point, so to speak.) It is exactly this, our inability to look at our art as business, the inability to look at ourselves as entertainers as well as artists, that will continue to speed the decline of an art form I dearly love.

    I think I was pretty clear in my discourse that I was not asking for all theatre actors to be or look like movie stars. Only that we begin to take a serious look at the theatre as a business, and hold ourselves to a higher standard in terms of how we present ourselves. In order to continue to survive, and to grow, the theatre needs to begin to look at itself through more of an business lens. It seems that within the last century, perhaps because of the rise of film, many theatre producers and creators have taken a pretty indignant track in the mounting of their productions. The attitude I perceive in many shows, and from many companies is; “this is ‘art.’ if you don’t like it, you’re stupid.” Now, I am aware that this statement sounds childish, but I cannot believe that you have not felt this while watching many shows in New York City. Do you really think that any film studio would last long if they took that attitude toward their movies? You didn’t see any studio heads out defending “Batman and Robin” when they released that movie. The watched the movie, looked at the critical and audience reaction, said to themselves…’people hate this movie.’ Then they got a new director and reset the path of the franchise. Look what happened, they packed the theatres, and created a better product in the process. Unfortunately, this is not the response of many theatre companies. They often respond with childish indignance (Leah gets a pass on this one, as her defense of ‘Snakes’ was intellectual and spoken with passion not merely defensiveness.) rather than with cold blooded, practical, objectivism. I would argue though, that having an ear to the desires of the audience is not impossible as you seem to imply, or in fact foreign to the theatre. Shakespeare performed his plays to packed houses that ran the gamut of the citizenry-from the richest to the poorest. It is well documented that he revised his work constantly in response to the reactions of the audience. So when I say ‘give them what they want’ I think I have some pretty good shoulders to stand on.

    Look, John, I am an actor and I have been in many shows and worked with many great actors, directors, and writers. There is no doubt in my mind that many actors will find my position objectionable. They will say, “oh, looks should have nothing to do with it. Business should have nothing to do with it. Like you they will say, ‘well, we can’t all be movie stars.’” Obviously, that’s true, if the guys and gals in the Tenement Street art collective had Steven Spielberg on the phone this morning, I doubt they would be showing up for rehearsal tonight. That being said, why can’t we look at ourselves in the same way and with the same respect. Not everyone can make a violin like Stradivarius, but that doesn’t mean they should not strive to. I believe that we should all make an effort to go on stage with the finest instrument s available to us. Obviously, everyone’s is different, but that does not mean we should not keep them tuned, polished, and well maintained.

    I also have to say in closing that I find your final comments about sending a bus to the Bronx to be disheartening. All I was saying is that if we want to reach a wider audience, we need to do theatre sometimes where that audience is. That being said, why couldn’t a theatre send a bus to pick up poor kids and bring them to a show? Many productions have spent their budget dollars on less important things, and they would be creating new potential audience members in the process. I don’t want to waste any more of Leah’s blog space in defense of my statements, but I stand by them. I want the theatre to survive and to flourish, and I firmly believe that a better attention to the business end of theatre puts us in the best possible position to continue this important art form. Thanks for your comments, and best of luck in the work you are doing. I wish you, and all theatre artists success, despite the differences in our philosophy.

    January 25, 2012 2:35 pm

Keep The Comments Coming!

I’m just going to keep posting these to get the momentum going.

Kevin, here are my responses to your comments and thank you! We love you too- and we also have a white, middle class guy in our company who we love! I agree with everything you say- except for one thing:

I don’t really understand why people keep saying that we’re trying to reach inner city kids through our show and then blasting us for being in Williamsburg.  Where did that come from?  Is it because we said that WE  are poor and that theater isn’t just for rich people aka rich actors, writers and directors?  Poor theater makers should have a voice too!!! Why is that so weird?   Besides,  our show is not appropriate for children. I repeat: DO NOT BRING YOUR KIDS TO THIS SHOW NO MATTER WHAT DEMOGRAPHIC!  It has curse words and blood and sex! Just because we are advocating for our rights as poor artists and standing up for our work and message does not mean we do shows for poor children. Children should not see this show. It is rated R!!!!

On the contrary, I actually think Flying Snakes is a good show for rich people to go see- because it’s a show made by poor people.  A lot of NYU students actually came to our last show and they were laughing at themselves. Particularly at this monologue which is delivered by Tricia Cramer- who went to NYU.  Because you know- the theater community ( a lot of theater makers) are comprised of rich white people (and rich to me also constitutes upper middle class and even middle class to some extent)  and trying to do it when you’re poor is often hilarious and sad… and we’re just are trying to tell our story because we don’t see it in the American theater often amidst stories about divorce problems and kitchen sink dramas. Why does it freak people out that we’re saying we’re poor artists? Why do you automatically assume we are being righteous and saying we want to reach underprivileged communities? We stated that some of us in ETG are FROM underprivileged communities. We grew up poor, we still make theater, and we’re not going away. I don’t understand why that creates such a stir, honestly.  And also- lets not make assumptions about where poor people hang out. Like..really? Why CAN’T poor people hang out in Williamsburg? Sure it has a lot of hipsters and probably a lot of them are rich- but I know that Joshua Conkel, a fellow playwright who comes from no money lives there.  And also- lets not make assumptions about what poor people read!!! I lived/ my high school was in the middle of the projects and I still read NY magazines! Theater is what got me through hard times growing up! That’s why I still do it!

And re: The Brick Theatre

IT is hands down THE BEST  DEAL IN TOWN in terms of producing plays. And that place is awesome. We love it.

Also Kevin- thanks for calling us out about Butler. You’re right- at least one of us went to Butler-Chase did and I did (though I may or may not have finished…long story).I was there on a Grant for minorities plus student loans and even though Chase  is a white guy-  he believes in our message- just like you ( even though our message is not showing kids our show- it’s that poor theater makers exist- and even if it’s killing us- we’re still going to make it)I am in complete agreement with you regarding the petty critic thing, but I think it’s okay to defend our work and we regret nothing. And weirdly enough…it  did do us really good in terms of ticket sales today.

Anyways, keep the comments rolling. We love you Kevin!

From Kevin Lind

I find myself so interested in all this drama and back and forth over the semi-negative review of your show, and your subsequent responses to it. I would like to offer a few comments of my own, as I find myself torn between both sides of the argument.

1. I think the mission of your company, and the message of your show are important ones. There is certainly and undeniably a huge percentage of the population of New York City that cannot afford or properly gain access to theatre of any level. That would certainly include $200 Broadway performances of Book of Mormon (Not gonna see many inner city kids in that theatre on a nightly basis) but would also include practically any show right down to the $18 off-off performances. However, I think you ignore an issue that is far bigger than the cost. I think the real issue here is that there is a perception among many many people, even those who have money to burn, that the theatre no longer offers a good return for your entertainment dollar. You can’t possibly deny that at least 75% of shows that are put up in this city (even on Broadway) are pretty much garbage. Either they are pure vanity projects (Ugh, another 50 year old Hamlet) misguided attempts at socio-political commentary (Glengarry Glenn Ross with an all female cast!) or just poorly and nepotistically cast (Broadway is particularly guilty of this.) People who are looking for a night out see the movies as a better bet. Yeah, a lot of movies are bad too, but even a bad movie like Transformers offers people high entertainment value. It undersells even the cheapest play by 4 bucks a ticket, and at it’s worst offers good production values, audible dialogue, a clear story, sexy actors, and themes young people can identify with. I would say that most theatrical productions I have seen (hundreds) offer two or less of these five things.
If we want to get young, “underprivileged,” and non-traditional audiences into the theatre, we need to provide them with stories they want to see, told in ways they want to see them. We cannot see the theatre as the dumping ground for all things too “arty” for the cinema, and we cannot give ourselves a pass as “theatre actors” to be shlubby, out of shape, nerds. This is not an argument against character actors, but an argument for theatre actors holding themselves to the same high standards as movie stars. (Stay in shape, eat right, be flexible and limber, keep stylish) You ever see Steve Buchemi do an interview in cargo shorts and a t-shirt? No, he always looks classy and put together, even as a pretty “ugly” man. We have to accept that if we want to go on stage and have people look at us for three hours, they need to have something dynamic to look at. Obviously, theatre cannot provide the level of effects or production values of movies, but we can tell stories that are just as young and exciting, and we can fill them with sexy, fit actors with strong voices and minds. We can do stories about sports, sex, and zombies. We can do wild comedies like the films of Judd Apatow. We can do romantic comedies and why couldn’t a script like Bridesmaids be a theatrical production. Yes we have to do stories we are passionate about, but you still gotta “give-em-what-they-want” so to speak. Lets not let ourselves off the hook by saying people just can’t afford it. I think that is a pretty small part of it.

2. I think it pretty unfair to criticize the reviewer of your show for the cost of his education, especially as at least one of you went to Butler University where tuition is currently $15,555 a semester, not including room and board. Sure, the cost of education in this country is a problem, but I don’t think that a person’s education expenses correlate directly to their views on art. I mean, look, your school was expensive, but you care about inclusive theatre. I never got the sense in his review that he was elitist or that his perspective was particularly upper-class. He just didn’t much like the show, and that’s his right and also his obligation as a reviewer; to provide his honest response. He is not supposed to review your “reasons” for doing the show, only if he found it enjoyable, thought-provoking, and entertaining. The real problem is not that only rich college educated kids are writing about and for the theatre, but our State and Local governments don’t care about theatre, so it is the first thing to get cut from middle school and high school budgets. If you want to flip the script on theatre’s upper class white bias, get your show out of The Brick (located smack in the middle of white upper middle class Williamsburg,) and get it into some high schools and community centers in the Bronx where you stand a chance of affecting some real change. In other words, if your gonna bitch about the crisp white linnens of the white man, you better have some mud on your clothes. (And not artfully arranged, hipster Williamsburg mud either. I know you guys are giving out freebies, props, but not many 17 year old black kids from the inner city Bronx are coming out there to the Lorimer stop on a Friday night, get real.)

3. Keep up the good work. I love that you guys are so vocal and contrary, and I love that you don’t take shit lying down. No doubt there are a lot of dumb-ass critics out there ( once a guy reviewed a play I was in, and he left at intermission. In his review, he said my monologue was great. The only problem…it was in act two after he left) I would just caution that you don’t let your antipathy towards the critical reaction to your work inflate your sense of self-righteousness. Keep yourselves focused on the real problems and on finding solutions to them and don’t get bogged down in petty bickering about reviews and the morons who mostly write them. Believe me, those “under-represented” audiences you are trying to reach, they don’t read NY Theater reviews, so don’t sweat the small stuff. Turn that energy into action, and push harder. That’s my two cents, hope you know I love you guys, even though I am white, male, upper middle class (thanks to my day job) and went to an expensive school (Yeah, it was Butler.)

From Lindsay Mack and Flying Snakes in 3-D!!!

From Lindsay:

We don’t hate you, Michael. Far from it. The thing that I took personally in your review is that you seemed to miss the point of our show. What you liked and didn’t like about the show, and what you thought worked and didn’t work isn’t what we were taking issue with. And personally speaking, that doesn’t bother me. I am speaking for myself and saying that I took issue with your review, because the message seemed to be that, and I will quote you directly, “I can’t help but think that Flying Snakes in 3-D!!! could be a real blast if they just stuck to entertaining.” We did not set out to make a show solely about flying snakes. We set out to make a show about a group of people who challenge themselves to the impossible task of making a show on stage that cannot exist outside of a movie, and chronicling the challenges of not only our dynamic as a theatre company in putting on this show, but I think a dynamic that is familiar to many young (and even older) theatre companies who make art from a place of passion and love for the art form. You message read as, “stop whining and make a show about snakes.” As a group of people who have something to say runs much deeper than a show about killer snakes, we did take offense to that. And to play devil’s advocate for a moment, as theatre goers, our job is to entertain, but it is also to express, to inform — but that closing line read to us as dismissive in a very insulting way to issues that are absolutely real to us. The problem with your review was not that you did not find the show excellent, or perfect, or even something that you would heartily recommend, it was that you overlooked the real reason we put on this play — to give voice to our experience. To MANY of us out there. We needed to defend our positions on the matter, and THAT was the thing that put a fire under us. And in fact, to quote you again, “It seems that the central message is “well there’s no way we can stay afloat with no money or resources and the art-form is dead, but, what the hell! Let’s do it anyway!”" — you missed that we do it because we LOVE it. Deeply and passionately. Theatre, although dying, is an art form that we will defend passionately. In no way are we at all arbitrary on how we feel about theatre. That was the problem. We could not stay silent in defending our message, and defending our experience as young theatre artists. And again, this had nothing to do with us not being able to take criticism (believe me, we’ve had our share of it) — and in fact, I saw some very valid points in your review. And in my opinion, these issues of class, unfairness, and lack of connections or monetary advantage that we address frankly in our show, regardless of whether you liked the show, or even whether you thought they were translated successfully (which you didn’t) are still ones that should be supported between young artists, and shouted from the roof tops.

-Lindsay Mack

PS from Leah

So–Michael Mraz and Everywhere Theatre Group are actually talking now, which is awesome. I’m really glad- theater worlds unite! It’s really important for young theater artists to try and understand each other rather than passive aggressively knock each other on facebook. Also Michael seems like a nice guy and we don’t hate him, although we obviously disagree on things. It’s not that we can’t handle  bad reviews- (ETG has gotten plenty of good and bad reviews in the past) and I think Lindsay does a good job explaining our initial response. 

 Oh…btw!!!!! To people who have been making fun of us for posting our good reviews from Tenement Street WorkshopTheater in The Now and Brooklyn Based- what is the matter with you??? We’re a theater company! That’s what we do! We promote our work anyway we can! That includes these blog posts! We love our audience!! 

PSS Come see FLYING SNAKES IN 3-D at 8PM Thursday, Friday and Saturday at The Brick Theater! Only three more performances! Get your tickets here 

Blanket Statements and a Textcerpt

Thanks for the overwhelming support, dialogue, and even backlash about my previous posts regarding Flying Snakes in 3-D. I truly do appreciate all of it. It’s exciting to me to have people talking regardless of if they agree with me, or think I am in  poor taste. I agree with Teddy when he said that, “theater should be a dialogue, not only with the audiences and critics, but with the mediums around it, including film, TV, music, and, of course, the internet. We  enjoy continuing the discussion”. I look forward to his response on the matter.

It’s very difficult to articulate my frustrations about theater, critics, class, money etc.  without sounding judgmental.   I realize my rant against Michael Mraz’s review and posting a private conversation with company members may have seemed mean to the critic- who we don’t know anything about personally. It’s just really hard for me not to be angry about the state of the world and it was easy to write his criticisms off  of a show that deals with class issues when we saw that he’s a white guy who went to a school that costs $19,672.00 a term plus living expenses in New York city. Even if I was  just going off the numbers/facts about inequality in gender gaps in the United States and the obscene class division that infects every aspect of this capitalist country- even the arts, I don’t know anything about this kid and he may have been on scholarship. I get that.

I won’t apologize for anything though- because in the end- this is my blog and I can write whatever I want. And if you’re reading this, you obviously care about what I have to say. So thank you.

Also, I’m just super jealous because I can’t afford an MFA and it just seems like a lot of people who get fellowships that I get rejected for have the time and the luxury to hone their talents ( and yes, I say talents- because talent is talent no matter where you are from) and supportive parents they can get money from whenever they want or even at least go home to them once in a while without getting kicked out of their own house on Christmas after their dad shoved you in front of your crying mother.  Whatever. Everyone works hard. But hard work and talent doesn’t get you success in this country and the unfairness is worth talking about because artists who come from these communities (me, others I know) rarely have a voice- and since theater makers/institutions tend to be more conservative than we expect—I really do believe  all of this is worth  talking about whether anyone agrees or disagrees. This is actually what our show is about.

Also: Some Monday Links about Flying Snakes in 3D

From Theater In The Now: http://www.theaterinthenow.com/2012/01/review-when-snakes-soar.html?spref=fb

From Julian Mesri: http://julianmesri.com/2012/01/23/for-a-ruthless-criticism-of-everything-existing-including-critics/

And this: http://www.apoorplayer.net/2012/01/the-great-whiter-than-ever-way/

Lastly- here is some more text from the show, <3 Leah

TEXCERPT from the show w/Teddy Nicholas, Lindsay Mack and Chase Voorhees

EVERYWHERE THEATRE GROUP MEETING, May 2011

In italics: Reenactment of an actual conversation

LEAH, TEDDY, LINDSAY and CHASE are sitting having a meeting, working hard on a grant application.

TEDDY

If we get this grant, we’ll get like ten thousand dollars.

LEAH

Oh my god. Can you imagine having ten thousand dollars to make a show?

TEDDY

If we had ten thousand dollars to make a show, we could make like ten War Horses.

LEAH

And we would never squander away grant money on a whirlwind European vacation and use “research” as an excuse to get fucked up and have philosophical conversations. Like who does that?

TEDDY

Rich white people do that.  Either they’re obsessed with their own privileged problems as if their parents getting a divorce was the end of world, or they’re constantly writing about other classes, races, or religions like they have any fucking clue what they are talking about

LINDSAY

Let the people who grew up there in those cultures and neighborhoods and countries have a voice on professional stages too.

LEAH

Like that’s ever going to happen.

TEDDY

It’s hopeless. We should just stop working on this application.

LINDSAY

We probably aren’t gonna get it anyway. And even if we do get it, it’s like, we’re being funded by the 1% which will devalue our authenticity.

CHASE

No, we shouldn’t give up. We could get it. And the 1% SHOULD be giving to the arts, so it’s fine. It’s better us get it than artists who are already rich and have trust-funds.

LEAH

I wish there was a portion in a grant application that makes people say how much money  their parents make and how nice and supportive they are.

LINDSAY

Well, I wish there was a grant only for artists who were abused by their parents, grew up poor, who can’t afford MFA’s but are really passionate and good- we would get it in a minute.

TEDDY

No. They’ll think we’re too young. We’re too young! Twenty-seven is like toddlers in the institutional giving world and in theatre.

LINDSAY

Is this hopeless?

TEDDY

Yeah.

LINDSAY

Then why are we still doing this? It doesn’t feel right to complain because nobody asks us to do it. So why are we still doing it?

LEAH

Because we love it. I mean, every time I think about quitting because theater is an inferior dying art form that is killing us and aging us prematurely from stress, I go to the rehearsal room and am reminded of why it’s so sweet and good.

TEDDY

Well I don’t even know if I love it or If I want to be doing it anymore to be honest. It’s scary.

CHASE

I think about that all the time.

LINDSAY

I’m so fucking exhausted.

LEAH

I feel so weighed down by constant rejection.

CHASE

I just want a break.

LINDSAY

Guys, people have it worse than this!  There are so many scary things in the world.

CHASE

Yeah, you know what’s really scary? Starvation and genocide

LINDSAY

Plagues and rape.

TEDDY

Global warming and racism.

LEAH

Snakes.

TEDDY

Oh my god, snakes are so scary.

LEAH

They’re the scariest animal in the world.

CHASE

I don’t think snakes are that scary.

LEAH

What’s the scariest animal in the world then?

CHASE

A bat that eats people.

LINDSAY

A talking spider.

TEDDY

Humans.

LEAH

Well what about like… a snake… that flies?

LINDSAY/TEDDY/CHASE

AHHH!!! (laughter)

TEDDY

Oh my god, that’s sooo scary!

LEAH

I KNOW, can you imagine how scary snakes  would be if they could fly? Like in the sky? From Space?!

CHASE

How would they fly exactly? Do they have wings?

TEDDY

No. They would just swim out of the ocean and soar into the sky and rip out people’s throats.

LINDSAY

That sounds like a perfect Sci Fi channel movie — they would be genetically engineered to fly. By scientists. Who were supposed to create a chemical compound for the US Army but they mutated King Cobras that were in the lab by accident!

LEAH

Or WAS it an accident?

TEDDY

And they escaped!!! And now the world is at danger! I fucking love movies like that, the plots write themselves.

CHASE

I love 3-D movies. I wish we could make that. It would be so fun.

LEAH

That should be our next show!

LINDSAY

OH MY GOD. I LOVE IT!

CHASE

Can there be a ragtag team of heroes who defeat the snakes?

LEAH

YES!

LINDSAY

There has to a couple in it who dies right at the beginning!

TEDDY

Wait, how is this going to work in theater. It sounds more like a movie. Like, a really bad movie.  And what is it going to be about?

LINDSAY

FLYING SNAKES! AND EXPLOSIONS! It’ll be hilarious!

LEAH

It could be about us, trying to make an impossible play that is better suited for an art form that is  equipped with the technology and money to make snakes fly.

TEDDY

Wait, would we be IN the show? I’m not comfortable with that. I’m not even comfortable being in this video.

CHASE

I’m like in love with this idea. I don’t care if we don’t have any money. I can make the video really awesome for it.

LEAH

Well, we don’t have to be in it, we can get actors to play us!

LINDSAY

Come on, this would be so much fun!

LEAH

Good, because it’s done.

TEDDY

Wait, it’s done?

LEAH

Yes. We made the show already.

CHASE

That’s why we’re doing this video. Dummy.

TEDDY

Oh, yes, of course. That’s why I’m being played by an actor right now.

PETER MILLS WEISS

Hello. My name is Peter Mills Weiss and I’ll be portraying co-writer and former ETG member Teddy Nicholas.

TRICIA CRAMER

    (also to the camera)
And I’m Tricia Cramer. I’ll be portraying Leah Winkler, co-writer, co-director ETG member and when you see this sign:

CUT TO: A SIGN THAT READS THROW YOUR SNAKES!

TRICIA CRAMER

Please throw your snakes at the actors!

LINDSAY

    (also to the camera)
And I’m Linsday Mack, actor, choreographer ETG member and I’m portraying myself because I’m an actress. I’ll also be playing the role of Inis Goodheart, a sexy doctor scientist rebel.

CHASE

    (also to the camera)
I’m Chase Voorhees, video director, sound designer ETG member and nobody is portraying me because I’m not really a character in this, I’m just like… I’m normal or whatever but sometimes I will shout things from the booth while I run the sound and video.Guys, are we ready to start?

CAST

Yes!

Three More Performances

 PURCHASE TICKETS BY CLICKING HERE

 “Can you think of any event where the cultural takeaway for the evening can be summed up with the directive to ‘Get these MOTHER%@$#ING SNAKES out of our MOTHER%@$#ING SKY!’ that isn’t awesome? What about a film that is so 3D that you can’t tell the difference between it and real life, because it might actually be real life, because it might actually be theater? Throw in some absurdly ridiculous special effects, dance, video, and social commentary, and you have Everywhere Theater Group’s new show Flying Snakes in 3D! debuting this week at The Brick. Though clearly a bit difficult to describe, this event touches upon and integrates everything from sci-fi, theater and technology, to art, parody, and human connection itself.  All this, for just $18 a ticket (roughly the same as any James Cameron-directed multidimensional monstrosity) which you can buy here. And if that isn’t enough to convince you, the hilarious-but-strangely-compelling trailer should. Why would you ever doubt us?“- Brooklynbased.net

 

ONLY  THREE MORE PERFORMANCES UNTIL THE SNAKES ARE DEAD FOREVER!!!!

January  26, 27, 28 at 8pm

All tickets: $18 Only at The Brick,

575 Metropolitan Avenue, Williamsburg, Brooklyn

At least we stand by our opinions. Every company says this shit amongst themselves. We are strong enough to let everyone see

Anonymous Review
lkjasj@gmail.com
24.209.205.213
Submitted on 2012/01/21 at 9:43 pm

Seems that you guys can’t handle any honesty in reviews. Out of the three reviews that you chose to post as some sort of rebuttal, two of them had to disclose a bias. In other words, don’t worry about using other reviews to counter this negative review–just makes it look like you’re ok with reviews, as long as they provide positive feedback and support.

Based on your email chain it appears that even you acknowledge that “theater is dying” and you acknowledge that this piece was created in response to the lingering death. I didn’t once get the since from his review that he was looking at it from a “white, privileged, yadda yadda” lens. Just seemed like he understood what your intentions were and said that you failed in delivering your message (he clearly gets what the message was), and if anything, you probably hurt your cause of proving theater’s worth–rather than help as you intended.

Also, 3rd paragraph, last sentence, he refers to Vorhees as “video director” and never once says ‘booth guy’ — says board operator in the tech booth at the end — funny how anger can warp words).

You say your cause is to keep alive a theater that is for everyone and not just white, upper middle class (quite specific really) or independently wealthy elites (this to say you’re ok with the dependently wealthy? That is probably a necessary stance in ‘Billyburg’).

Why don’t you work to find ways to bring your theater to these audiences? I can bet you that the less privileged, non-white, non-upper middle class, non-wealthy theater audiences are not attending performances in Williamsburg for $18. (excluding of course the dependently wealthy you serve)

In fact, on the website it says,

“The Brick: for the nerds, outcasts, and mad experimenters of theater. That includes both creators and spectators.”
—Time Out New York

This says nothing about the discriminated, underprivileged audiences which are excluded from the arts. Read over your emails, gather your thoughts and don’t let your anger over one person’s opinion of your show boost your own egos. Your responses end up sounding just as pretentious and snarky as the reviewer with the BFA.

leahnana
leahwinkler.com
leahnana@gmail.com
74.73.88.236
Submitted on 2012/01/21 at 10:20 pm | In reply to Anonymous Review.

first of all, why are you anonymous? If you’re going to make huge assessments- have the guts to put your name on it.

Second of all, thanks for the comments. We will be using them in the preshow. And thanks for pointing out my typos, very helpful. I’ve fixed them. If you come to the show,  you will see that Snakes simply addresses the unfairness of class division in the theater and the leverage rich theater artists have over poor theater artists with humor and anger. We’re just writing our perspective  that isn’t addressed all the time

Here are my responses to your comments.

Seems that you guys can’t handle any honesty in reviews. Out of the three reviews that you chose to post as some sort of rebuttal, two of them had to disclose a bias. In other words, don’t worry about using other reviews to counter this negative review–just makes it look like you’re ok with reviews, as long as they provide positive feedback and support.

Actually, we love honesty in reviews. That’s why we made such a big deal out of this one and wrote about it.  It’s an interesting debate. And of course every artist loves positive reviews. Do you not expect artists to defend their work?

Based on your email chain it appears that even you acknowledge that “theater is dying” and you acknowledge that this piece was created in response to the lingering death. I didn’t once get the since from his review that he was looking at it from a “white, privileged, yadda yadda” lens. Just seemed like he understood what your intentions were and said that you failed in delivering your message (he clearly gets what the message was), and if anything, you probably hurt your cause of proving theater’s worth–rather than help as you intended.

We assessed that he was looking at it from a “white priveledge, yadda yadda” lens ( thank you for making it sound like criticizing white privilege, which is a huge issue in this country- a country founded on slavery is a bad thing) because we looked at his bio and he’s a white dude who went to NYU. Theres nothing wrong with being a white dude who went to NYU- but it did piss us off that a white dude from NYU was lecturing to us, a group comprised of a female, a minority female, a gay male and admittidly- a privileged white dude (chases) – about petty narrative structure without addressing the message of class. I see how that can read as immature, but that’s how we felt. Can’t help it.
Again, why are you posting this as an anonymous person? Are you the guy who reviewed us? It says from your IP address that you are from Cincinnati. Wish you could come see our show and you’ll see what I mean.

Also, 3rd paragraph, last sentence, he refers to Vorhees as “video director” and never once says ‘booth guy’ — says board operator in the tech booth at the end — funny how anger can warp words).

Thanks for pointing that out! I’ll fix it in the blog post that he refers to Vorhees as board operator in the tech booth ( which is also incorrect btw).

You say your cause is to keep alive a theater that is for everyone and not just white, upper middle class (quite specific really) or independently wealthy elites (this to say you’re ok with the dependently wealthy? That is probably a necessary stance in ‘Billyburg’).
Why don’t you work to find ways to bring your theater to these audiences? I can bet you that the less privileged, non-white, non-upper middle class, non-wealthy theater audiences are not attending performances in Williamsburg for $18. (excluding of course the dependently wealthy you serve) In fact, on the website it says,“The Brick: for the nerds, outcasts, and mad experimenters of theater. That includes both creators and spectators.”—Time Out New York. This says nothing about the discriminated, underprivileged audiences which are excluded from the arts. Read over your emails, gather your thoughts and don’t let your anger over one person’s opinion of your show boost your own egos. Your responses end up sounding just as pretentious and snarky as the reviewer with the BFA.

I don’t know if it’s an necessary stance in ‘billyburg”. I live in Queens. I am an Asian American female artist who comes from a poor family. Do you really want to pass those kinds of judgements on me? My demographic is excluded from the arts. I am living proof that theater is for people like me and not just the elites. This is why I fight for us and same with Teddy- who grew up in a cockroach infested house and Lindsay, who I wont speak for- but has been through shit you can’t imagine.  I guarantee you that ETG’s audiences are differentfrom the theater crowd, because we do reach out to them. Chase is a white male from the middle class ( growing up with more money than us) and he still believes in this message. You can judge us all you want, but we’re not the hipsters you wish we were.

Why don’t you work to find ways to bring your theater to these audiences? I can bet you that the less privileged, non-white, non-upper middle class, non-wealthy theater audiences are not attending performances in Williamsburg for $18. (excluding of course the dependently wealthy you serve)

Actually, we do. We gave away 24 tickets the other day to people who couldn’t afford it, and have been offering discount codes left and right for $12 tickets. And $18 is a bargain- just as much as a movie. You can ask anyone who comes sees our shows, that ETG theater goers are not typical theater goers because we do make a huge effort to reach out.

Anyway, thanks for commenting. I’m glad we touched a nerve.
Come see our show if you can!

From Teddy Nicholas:

First of all, the only reviews we had were yours and the ones we posted, and two of those were written by friends of the company. We can’t help it if those are the only reviews published on the internet so far and of course we’re going to use them anyway we can because that’s what a theater company does: Use reviews to reflect the audience’s reactions/perceptions of the piece.

Theater is a dialogue, not only with the audiences and critics, but with the mediums around it, including film, TV, music, and, of course, the internet. So we are glad when we have any reviews/feedback to us especially posted anonymously in comments on Leah’s personal blog to respond to because we enjoy continuing the discussion.

We created the piece out from a place of love and frustration: Love for theater and film, love for storytelling and exploring narrative, love for science fiction genres and over-the-top performance. Frustration because we are poor, struggling theater artists who couldn’t even make our budgetary goal from our fundraiser for our entire season of programming (we asked for $6,000 on IndieGoGo and didn’t quite make it (even though plenty of lovely and wonderful supportive friends and family contributed as much as they could and we thank them wholeheartedly) which is A LOT of money to us but not as much as a lot of other companies ask for in our downtown-DIY-theater community, and we produce work consistently).

So yes, there’s a sort of dichotomy of emotion and thought behind the creation of Flying Snakes in 3-D, but we also felt the two were complimentary with each other: We didn’t want to just create the science fiction narrative we were excited to make because it was fun and quirky and make people laugh, but we also didn’t want to be preachy and mopey about being poor and how unfair it is that we live in an economy that values trashy entertainment over thought-provoking, boundary-pushing work. So we combined the two and we felt the balance was well but obviously Mr. Mraz felt the work was imbalanced, which is fair, maybe our fast-paced dialogue raced too far ahead of him to catch up to us, or perhaps the meta-narrative devices were a little too confusing (although it’s not as complicated as the movie Inception, which by the way we make reference to with the music (something Mr. Mraz also failed to catch)).

And of course theater is dying. Look at the vast number of theaters closing because they can’t make their yearly budgets. Look at the number of grants that are decreasing year after year because the government would rather fund another war against an idea or bailout a financial institution that ultimately sets the economy back even further, instead of pouring money into something that might actually help stimulate discussion, as we are doing now, and bring communities together.

Do you think we don’t want to bring our work to other communities? Of course we do. We would love the opportunity to showcase our works to other venues, cities, countries, etc. BUT WE CAN’T AFFORD IT! DUH! THAT’S WHAT WE’RE TALKING ABOUT!

And if it sounds like we hurt our cause of proving theater’s worth, and intentionally failed, then maybe that’s true, but it’s only because there’s isn’t a simple explanation. How can you reason why you feel passionately about an idea when you struggle to correctly articulate it to begin with?

Of course all of these issues are addressed in our show which sounds to me like you haven’t seen. What’s confusing to me is how Mr. Mraz seems to understand these points we’re making and yet writes this review where he doesn’t seem to allow those thoughts or ideas to sink in, nor does he seem willing to answer any of the questions we pose to the audience with this play.

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