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That was an obvious senseless ramble- but I am thinking about all of this, because I’m going through feedback forms from a reading for my play, Death For Sydney Black and amidst the encouraging, thoughtful comments that every writer enjoys to read, I find this one (there is always one):
How did The Play make you feel:
THAT THE WATCH HAS STOPPED. THE PLAY IS BOTH OVERWRITTEN AND UNDER THOUGHT, TRAFFICKING IN ENDLESS CLICHES, WITH NO INSIGHT, NO INTELLIGENCE, ONLY SMUG, SELF-SATISFIED SUPERIORITY WHICH THE AUDIENCE IS INVITED TO JOIN.THE POST PORN DEVELOPMENT IS THE ONLY TESTIMONIAL TO THE WRITER’S LACK OF IMAGINATION.
Any Misc. Feedback?
PLEASE NEVER AGAIN
Ahhhh. Yikes. Okay. But it happens. And thus I was about to move on- until I saw this interview from my new BFF, Rebecca Black. (yes, I’m selling t-shirts. Because this is Amerrrrrica).
I don’t really have anything to say about the interview except that it’s made me think about the difference between constructive criticism and bullying. And also, I wanted to mention Rebecca Black on my blog one last time (see: Yesterday Was Thursday, Thursday) because it’s getting a lot of hits (3600 in the last two days to be exact. So um. Rebecca Black, Rebecca Black, Rebecca Black, Friday Friday Friday google google google).
Which segues into the second reason I am thinking about all of this.
I know what it’s like to be a hater (GO CUT YOURSELF REBECCA BLACK! j/k, I’m broke- buy a t-shirt) and sometimes, I can’t tell if my criticisms are actually constructive or productive or just plain mean and personal- so I refrain from giving my opinion unless it is specifically asked for. However, I recently went to a friend’s comedy show (The Love Triangle Show: 3rd Friday Of Each Month) where a Certain Stand-up Comedian decided that it would be really fun and original to make jokes about the earthquake/tsunami/nuclear disaster in Japan. And although I have been busy blogging about sillier things to keep my mind off of it, I have family there and this whole earthquake disaster has affected me and them in very confusing, overwhelming ways. So naturally, I am going to get really pissed off/sensitive when this Certain Stand-up Comedian, who prompted to make sure everyone in the room was white (literally) before telling his jokes about Japanese people, starts to do the latter.
I know what it’s like to work hard on something and have it completely dismissed as a piece of trash by someone. It sucks. And although this might sound cliche, I consider comedians artists too (that shit seems hard you guys). So I almost felt sorry for this guy as I revealed that I was actually not white (gasp! I know) and that making jokes about this wasn’t cool and he fumbled until he made some desperate comment about how he shouldn’t piss off Japanese people because they all know kun-fu (barf) and I called him a racist. My anger lead me to a binge drinking session which culminated into yet another tearful fight with a cab driver who he asked me what language I was speaking on the phone to my mother and proceeded to tell me I don’t look Japanese at all (magically-it ended well and we managed to shake hands by the time I got home).
Someone who heard this story made the excellent point that “inappropriate jokes” like this are only a problem worth fighting against if people are actually laughing at them. Nobody laughed when this guy told his jokes. Gilbert Gottfried got fired for his. So maybe my heckling wasn’t exactly necessary. Was it constructive? I don’t know. Bullying? Maybe? But I feel like he bullied me first. Like, I know it’s not my job to spread awareness about this Certain Comedian’s idiocy, the silence of the audience said it all, and my only job throughout this tragedy is to do what I can for my family. And it certainly didn’t make me feel better when the Certain Stand-up Comedian told my friend to tell me that he was “sorry if he made me mad or whatever” and it doesn’t really make me feel better that I probably ruined his performance (though it didn’t make me feel bad either).
In turn, I know the person who wrote those negative marks on my feedback card will hate my play no matter what and that makes me feel kind of at peace. Maybe it just hit too close to home or they were just bored. Who knows. Like my half-boozy rantings to Certain Stand-Up Comedian’s act, the comments weren’t constructive enough. But I can’t really dismiss the comments as bullying either, because she/ he’s just telling the truth about a reaction he/she had and that is valuable. And I’ll keep working on that play despite the NEVER AGAIN comment and ultimately, I don’t really care that much.
And as for the Certain Stand Up Comedian, he, like Rebecca Black who will probably keep capitalizing on her fifteen minutes with really shitty music no matter what her haters say- will probably keep making jokes about the disaster and not care that much either…well until he loses a job or something.
We all seem to just keep going.
But I can’t help but wonder, as I read that one negative feedback form over and over and over, if he too, is playing my attempt at heckling in his head over and over and over…..
Your writing, at least judging from this Blog, is very intelligent! It is, judging from this Blog, very much “stream of consciousness”, you write what you think as you think it! From the review you posted, and reviews are opinions, I have a feeling that your Plays are written in much the same manner. Is that ALL bad? NO! Is that ALL good? Hell No! A writer must be true to themselves, BUT (and that is one BIG but) if you truly wish to connect with audiences you must bring them around to your point of view and your meaning by use of well thought out words. That does not mean you need to change your meaning one little bit, it simply means that you need to put more thought in to how you say what you mean! It all revolves around to IF you really want your audiences to HEAR you or if you are more involved with saying what you want how you want to say it and DAMNED IF I CARE what they think.
I have a feeling that what you feel and what you think just may be something the world needs to HEAR, so would it be so bad if you wrote it in a form where they might actually listen without wanting to NEVER DO IT AGAIN!!
Having said that, very stream of consciousness wise, I like your Blog. I LOVE your passion for your art. And, I AT LEAST, hope to see some of that art the nest time I am in NYC! I am also suggesting that my producing partner in NYC go see your Play, he never jumps to a conclusion and will give it a REAL evaluation!
Have a GREAT Saturday!
A. Michael Storm
1. If you know the person, and they’re reacting in a destructive way. Cut the person out of your life. It’s too short to concern yourself with someone trying to tear you down.
2. Keep being honest in your writing. It’s naturally clever, funny and provoking because it’s honest.
3. You didn’t bully the Certain Comedian, you defended those who could not defend themselves. That is honorable.
4. When all else fails, take a little advice from my buddy, Ice T: rtsp://v4.cache1.c.youtube.com/
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haha. thanks James. I think you are right.
thanks Michael, for the kind words! Means a lot! Hope to catch your work sometimes as well